Pyramid Level 5: Manifest In Authenticity

We refrain from telling what we think.

We also refrain from saying "I'm not interested".

We don't buy things we love because it's uncommon among our circle.

Freedom doesn't have limits. Don't let your mind create them.

This is the top of our Pyramid, it's gonna be complex and hard to achieve. Moreover, it requires all previous Levels.

There were so many things and experiences in this world dragging our curiosity, but the first question comes into play: What would my friends/family say? I better skip it to keep my image untouched.

Your image has to be in accord with yourself, not with anyone else in this world. There's nothing wrong whether it's gonna change 30 times in 5 years.

There are 2 main reasons for your image to change:

You are not satisfied with who you are
You've discovered things that reshape your worldview - which I believe can happen until last day alive

Refraining is the mirror of our childhood traumas:

Too fat or too skinny? Bullying.
Bad degrees? Punished.
Have a different opinion? Excluded.
Failed at something? Laugh at.

Growing up with these negative feelings, we naturally started to create our image fitting the exterior, not ourselves.

Self-image was unconsciously adopted as a shield against bad reactions, rather than a speaks-by-itself thing.

Most people have gone through this kind of childhood and are not aware of the consequences. At 20, 30, 50 years, do you know who's behind that shield named self-image?

A scared kid
An unheard and unseen kid
A kid with lots of dreams but afraid to follow
A kid missing support
A kid craving to show his true self

Right now, I believe that authenticity is the supreme state we can live, and for a few reasons:

Allows us chasing our dreams, no matter their kind
Prevents resentments, because we always say and act what we believe
Makes us responsible for our decisions
Comes with the power of not caring about how hard people try to put us down

Being authentic unlocks an amazing feeling: self-love.

There is one rule of thumb though: don't harm other people pretending you're just authentic.

I labelled it as the supreme state for a good reason. To be able to live this way, all the previous Pyramid's levels we've discussed should be understood and adopted.

Being respectful and good to yourself means you can be the same with others, without resentments.

How many times have you helped someone in the past, and they've treated you badly afterwards?

Be honest, didn't your mind pull out the moment when you've offered help and started to curse that person for how he's been with you after all you did for him?

We need to let this behaviour go. It's just fuel to ignite negative emotions in our mind.

Being present allows the separation of the past from the present.

It's obvious, indeed, but we don't separate them. The proof is bringing the help offered in the past into the action happening in the present.

Let me share a couple of personal stories to better exemplify types of authenticity.

Career: From Tester to Software Engineer

Although I've had a degree in Computer Science, it barely meant anything in real life scenarios.

The biggest move I've done was leaving my ego aside, and accept the fact I knew nothing about programming, but I was keen to learn.

I just was authentic when I spoke with the CTO, telling him I want to step up, and I'm ready to work extra hours to catch up.

I was not pretenting like others do, because I'd have to be more careful not to be caught rather than to learn.

He was more than happy to help, and even gave me 2 hours of the total of 8 to focus on programming, without doing extra hours.

Mindset: From depressive to "Zen"

3 years ago, my mind created an entire web of negativity:

I don't earn enough money
I don't see myself in a relationship
I'm far from getting the body I want
I don't own a home

I was dead inside. On the outside, everything seemed perfect in my life. That had me close to craziness. Days were passing by fast and meaningless.

When I got scared enough of where that road was leading to, a spark of authenticity brought me to ask for help for the first time in my life.

That was the most important decision I made, because getting my mind healthy and positive, all my dreams started to come alive.

Don't wait to die to go to heaven, nobody knows whether it's real. Build your heaven while alive and feel it daily.

What's heaven's meaning? To do whatever you want, whenever you want, right? Anything you want is available.

I would rephrase it: heaven is the place where you can finally be authentic.

Do you realise that heaven is built upon reality and what you've experience so far in your life?

There is no reason to deprive yourself from being authentic each day or working towards your deep aspirations.

Treat yourself every day like you'd treat the most important guest coming at your dinner.

Letter's Quest

Pick 2-3 areas where you do not excel as you'd like to.

As we've learned in Pyramid Level 2, the first step is to accept the present. This is how we are, and there's no reason not to be authentic.

Just now we are starting the path towards that person we'd love to be.

For each area, I want you to take some time to reflect on every single aspect you can change, that will move you closer to who you want to be.

There are an infinite number of possibilities to get there, but you need to pick the ones you're comfortable with.

Use the tools to get a better vision of what you need:

Mindfulness - let the mind tell us about the fears holding you back
Journaling - bring thoughts to reality
Mirror speaking - observe your facial expressions, emotions
Meditation - imagine your life being that person, how you'd act and be?

If you've used at least 2 out of the above tools, there's enough information to work with.

From now on, you can manifest 2 parts of yourself:

The authenticity of who you are
The authenticity of who you're becoming

Authenticity is exterior agnostic. It only goes inside-out.

Until the next letter, I wish you success in everything you're up to!